Saturday, April 17, 2010

Freakin' Mohican

Freakin’ Mohican: Recipe For Destruction

Remembrances of The Mohican 100 Mile or Mohican 100 K Endurance Mountain Bike Race.

A rough recipe for this endurance event in Ohio includes:

• 4 parts of water (3.5” in the 24 hours preceding the race after a whole week of rain.)
• 8 parts dirt
• 1 part leaves, stick and pine needles.
• Three parts rocks
• 2 parts roots.
• 2 parts of elevation gain. I know its Ohio, but there is damn near as much elevation gain as in the Wilderness 101. Over 11,000 feet in 100 miles. Who knew?
• 160+ racers
• First checkpoint at mile #27 Or mile 35 for the full half of the field that got lost… (yes me too) Ride bike for a minimum of 3+ hours to reach said checkpoint (top finishers) or over 8 hours for bottom feeders. Me just under 4 hours.
• No signs for 20 miles of twisty intersecting single track before check point # 1 (all stolen the night before?)
• Lightning and hail warnings
• 2 parts bonus hike-a-bike not quite as bad as Iron Cross, but not part of the course either
• 1 part hike-a-bike up the face of a damn too steep to push your bike, had to carry (5 miles from the end) 200’+- elevation gain
• Attrition rate must exceed 25%
• Crash bikes in every conceivable manner imaginable.
o Yours truly all during the event:
1. Over the bars: tuck and roll, modified superman, and full bar straddle, heel click to full on sprint down hill to remain upright
2. Biff front wheel left and right repeat numerous times or until you can no longer mount bike
3. Rear wash out left and right repeat numerous times or until you can no longer mount bike
4. Walk bike for miles, up hill, down hill, flat terrain, advanced trails, expert trails and even novice trails…helps mix ingredients
5. And fail to make the short extremely steep climb, put your foot down on a slippery root (down hill side) and tumble over a cliff
6. Fully submersed after slipping off creek side trail and falling into 6’ of water

• Numerous unmarked road turns
• Broken chain
• Mix all dry and liquid ingredients in a big basin. Allow to congeal shortly. Roll rubber tires though quagmire until tires scoop up enough of the mixture that the wheels will no longer turn at all. Stop bike and scrape off enough mud to continue. CURSE! Repeat every 500 yards or until a stream crossing affords the opportunity to dunk the entire bike under water to allow forward locomotion. Repeat for 100 K, 100 miles, 5.5 hours (top 100K) 8.5 hours top 100 Mile or stagger in after 17 hours under you own power (last finisher at 12 PM) Whichever is longer and more painful. Or continue until the will to move forward and finish is overcome by man’s natural affinity toward self-preservation and survival.
• Drink beers, lick wounds, and make plans for the Wilderness 101 in July.

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